Day 21, Tuesday, 9 March Unless you forgive …

 

RETREAT IN LENT 2021

Day 21, Tuesday, 9 March 

Unless you forgive …

I remember a homily given by the late Fr Raymond Kapito where he spoke at length about forgiveness. He told many, often amusing, stories in his concern to hammer home the lesson of forgiveness; that it was not easy but it was essential if we are to break through the barriers that divide people and cut the spiral of bitterness and recrimination that can sometimes exist even in families.

I am always struck by how Mark begins his gospel with Jesus insisting from the beginning on the call to ‘change your way of thinking’. The Greek word Mark uses is metanoia, sometimes translated as ‘repent’ (Mark 1:15) but it is more than repentance. It is a whole new way of seeing things.

Jesus gives a story in today’s reading (Matthew 18:21-35) where he basically says, ‘you are happy when someone forgives you and solves your problem but you can’t see that this binds you to forgive others and solve theirs – which can often be much smaller than yours’. In the introduction to the parable, Matthew tells us the disciples wanted to put limits to forgiveness but it is clear that Jesus reacted radically to this. There are no limits. Both Jesus - and Kapito - are saying this is the test of being a follower of his: my attitude to others has to be unconditional just as God’s love for me is unconditional.

Unconditional, except that we do have to ask for forgiveness. God loves us without conditions but he cannot give us ‘life to the full’ unless we want it and so there has to be a turning towards the Lord. We have only to think of the prodigal son. He came to his senses and said, ‘I will arise and go to my father’ (Luke 15:18). Without that, the father could do nothing. But when he does return, all the father can think of is celebrating. There isn’t a word of judgement or condemnation. Ancient Israel learnt this lesson quickly: God was ‘a God of tenderness and compassion’ (Exodus 34:6). He longs to forgive, to heal, to make whole. We find it hard; we want to put up conditions. ‘OK, I’ll forgive but I won’t forget!’ Forgiveness is liberating – for the one forgiven and for the one forgiving.

The first reading today, from Daniel (3:34-43), laments the failure of Israel to understand these things and keep the covenant. But from bitter experience in the exile, the prophet speaks of Israel at last having a ‘contrite heart’ and ‘seeking the face’ of God once more.